


Child Support

by stars_will_fall



Category: The Adventure Zone (Podcast)
Genre: 2taakitz2week, Based on a Tumblr Post, Cat Dads, M/M, day 2: pets, taakitzweek
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-01
Updated: 2018-10-01
Packaged: 2019-07-23 13:30:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,875
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16159913
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/stars_will_fall/pseuds/stars_will_fall
Summary: Kravitz is new to the neighborhood and has recently taken in the neighborhood stray only for her to end up pregnant thanks to the neighbor's cat. Luckily, his neighbor is cute and he would be more than happy to share the position of cat grandpa with him.





	Child Support

It all started with a note. Purple and gaudy with intricate, looping, golden letters it stood out against the deep chestnut door of Kravitz’s home where it sat right in the middle, impossible to miss. At least Kravitz certainly noticed it immediately as he pulled into the driveway, and once he reached the door he pulled it down, only to be assaulted by the overwhelming smell of lavender and lemon. Whoever this was had not only taken the time to make him a handwritten note, but had it seems also sprayed it down with enough perfume to give someone an asthma attack. Kravitz folded the letter gingerly and shook his head in bemusement as he pulled out his keys and unlocked the door. As soon as it opened, a large black cat pushed its way past his legs and Kravitz gave him a small nod in acknowledgement. “Afternoon, Mortem. Be home for dinner, yes?” The cat lifted its head to look at him through lazy eyes and let out a hoarse meow before trotting across the front porch, down the steps, and into the yard. 

Kravitz took his shoes and coat off at the door and took a quick glance around the house to make sure nothing had been destroyed while he was gone. See, Kravitz was new to the neighborhood, and Mortem was still new to Kravitz and his home and had a terrible habit of destroying his things while he was at work. She was getting better about it though! After all, until the last month or so when he’d taken her in, she’d only been a stray living in the decrepit old shed the house had had before him. It was going to take her some time to get used to life in a house. This was precisely why he was still letting her take her time outside each day despite having all the cat necessities inside. 

Once he was happy with his quick inspection of the house (no kitty pee on the floor this time, and it seems she had finally taken to her scratching post instead of his furniture), Kravitz took a seat on the couch and took a look at the note he’d been left. It read:

_Dear whoever you are,_

_I see that someone’s finally moved into the house next door, and I guess that someone is you, homie. Thanks for getting rid of that nasty shed. Istus knows I hated seeing that thing out of my bedroom window every night. Thing was mad haunted. Pretty sure I saw glowing eyes in there sometimes that weren’t the panther’s. Or, well, I think you call her Mortem now. I heard you calling for her in the yard the other day. It’s pretty cool of you to take her in like that. I’ve tried before, but uh her and my chimichurri are just a little too friendly if you know what I mean. Shit, you definitely don’t know what I mean. Chimichurri is my cat. Not the sauce. Although that would be pretty funny. ANYWAY, I was saying, welcome to the neighborhood. You should definitely come by some time and say hi. Oh, and expect some goodies in the next couple of days. For now, peace out._

Your neighbor,  
Taako Taaco (the house to the left of yours) 

He’d surrounded his signature with little hearts, clearly not happy with just how extra the whole letter already was. Just as Kravitz was going to read the letter for a second time around, there was a knock on the door and he was forced to get back up. He opened the door, but before he had a chance to greet whoever was on the other side, he was interrupted. “Well hey there, handsome. Lup was not wrong about you.”  
Kravitz blinked, taking a moment to forget his manners and stare down the elf in front of him. He was tall, almost as tall as Kravitz himself with long, pale hair pulled into a messy braid that hung over his shoulder. His eyes, Kravitz noticed, were two different colors, one a light blue the other vibrant green, both framed nicely by a smattering of freckles across his cheeks. Kravitz was forced to snap out of it when he wiggled his fingers of the hand that was still held out to him expectantly. “I’m Taako. You got my note?”

Kravitz took his hand, giving it a firm shake. “I, uh, yes. Yes, sorry I did. Just now. I’m Kravitz.”

Taako smiled and before Kravitz knew it a basket was being shoved into his arms. Where had he even gotten that from? “I said to expect some goodies in the next couple of days, but uh the baking got a little out of hand. So, expect them now I guess. Just a welcome to the neighborhood gift, y’know, now that you’re settled in and everything. Anyway, I live next door with my sister and her husband and, well, I know pretty much everyone in the neighborhood so if you ever want to chill and get in on the gossip, you should hit me up.” 

“Oh, uh, sure. Thank you. For the gift and the offer. I’ve not really had the chance to get out and meet anyone yet so, I think I’ll have to take you up on that sometime…” Kravitz trailed off, looking down as he felt something brush up against his leg and past him into the house. He expected to see Mortem, already back from her little outing for the night, but instead he caught the tail end of a scrappy looking brown tabby. Taako groaned. 

“Sorry about that. That would be my right-hand man. Chimichurri. Chimi for short. Or he also answers to asshole. Or occasionally sweet bastard child.” Kravitz gave Taako a look only to receive a shrug in return. “We have a complicated relationship.” Taako leaned past Kravitz and called into the house for his cat, but Chimichurri only meowed and defiantly planted his ass right on Kravitz’s coffee table. Kravitz’s chuckled. 

“Well, since it looks like he doesn’t plan on leaving anytime soon, you’re welcome to come in.”

Taako waved his hands out in front of him. “Nah, dude. You just got back from work, right? I don’t want to bother you. I can just grab him.”

“It’s okay, really. You’re not interrupting anything. I’ve got to wait for Mortem to get back before dinner anyway.”

Taako laughed, covering his mouth with one well-manicured hand. “You wait for your cat to get back before starting dinner?” 

“Don’t judge me! She likes to eat with other people around. Who would I be to deny her that.” 

“You’re adorable. Tell you what, I’ll stick around, but will you let me make you dinner? Y’know since I’m totally intruding and used to be a professional chef and all. Its only right of me.”

Kravitz thought on it for a minute and nodded. “Sure, that would be wonderful.”

And so Kravitz and Taako spent the rest of the night getting to know each other. Kravitz learned all about Taako’s new cooking school and the fact that he used to be an actual TV chef. He learned about the other neighbors, some of whom had essentially raised Taako and his twin sister when they were just some homeless kids in the area and about how he got ahold of his cats, Garyl and Chimichurri. In turn, Taako heard all about Kravitz’s dreams of being a conductor and his current job at the mortuary his mother owned and got to make all sorts of jokes at Kravitz’s expense. The goth aesthetic he had going leant itself to some teasing after all! When Taako left that night, it was with a happy heart and a promise to do this more often, a promise that was kept as dinner with Kravitz became a bi-weekly event, switching between the two houses every time. 

Kravitz was taking well to the neighborhood and his new routine. Everything was going great until it wasn’t. About four months into living peacefully in the new neighborhood with his nice house, his great, and the frankly amazing elf and maybe boyfriend next door, shit just had to hit the fan. Somehow work had gotten even busier than usual, keeping him there later and later, which meant he had to cancel with Taako on multiple occasions and he hardly ever got to spend time with Mortem. He promised both of them that things would be great once work slowed back down, but that promise too faced some unexpected setbacks as one night, Mortem just didn’t come back. Usually, she would stay out for a day or two at the most, but it had been two weeks now. He’d put up signs around the neighborhood to no avail and was getting ready to check the pound again when he heard a familiar knock on the door. He pulled his coat on and grabbed his keys before opening it with a small frown. 

“Taako, I’m so sorry. I’ve got to cancel again. I was just on my way to the pound to look for Mortem.”

“Oh, well if that’s why you’re calling for a rain check this time have I got good news for the both of us.” He smiled, lifting the cat in his arms up. “I found her this morning, but you’d already gone to work, and I didn’t want you all distracted so I figured I’d tell you as soon as I got back. Turns out she must really miss that old shed out back because I found her in mine. Looks like she’s been living in there.” 

“Oh, Taako, Thank you!” Kravitz’s eyes lit up and he made grabby hands for the cat that Taako happily handed over. Kravitz held her close, looking her all over. “Dear lord, it’s almost as if she’s doing better without me. Not a scratch and she’s even put on more weight.

“See, about that…” Taako looked a little sheepish as he reached down and grabbed a large bag of cat food with a paper stapled to the front that read, in large letters, CHILD SUPPORT. “I noticed a couple of weeks ago that she was looking a little bigger and just kind of ignored it, but when I found her today I took her to my vet and it looks like my warning about her and Chimi being a little too close was well founded because uh…” Taako gestured to the cat. “Yeah, sorry. Looks like we’re going to be grandfathers to a couple of kittens.” 

Kravitz looked at the bag of food, then to Mortem, and then to Taako and laughed. “Well then, it looks like we’ll be spending more time together soon. You know I’m not taking care of kittens on my own.” 

Taako looked up at him. “You’re not mad? I know it’s not really ideal. I told you chimichurri is kind of an asshole, but I guess it’s kind of my fault for not getting the guy neutered yet.”

“Not at all Taako, I’m as much to blame as you are. Besides, how hard could taking care of a couple of kittens be?”

They had no idea what they were in for.

**Author's Note:**

> I've been excited to write this one for weeks, so hopefully you all like it! This is a shortened version of what I'd like to maybe do in the future.I'd love to extend this chapter and make this a muli-chapter fic in the future so please leave me some feedback! Also, spay and neuter your pets everybody!!! based on this tumblr post: http://jessefuckingmccree.tumblr.com/post/177283641065/imagine-your-otp


End file.
